Spare The Rod And Care The Child
Before holding the rod in our hand we must look into the following points:-
Spare Time to Explain
If we can spare time to explain our kids on the subject matter then we can easily spare the rod. But mostly, we do not have that much time to wait but want instant result. So, instead of explaining the reasons in detail we hold the rod to get it done fast. If they are doing their homework very slowly then what should be the problem to us? But actually, we do not want to remain engage with their homework any longer and at last we use the rod. Of course, we get the result immediately but its adverse effect may last for years. Instead of it we can explain the importance of speed while playing with them.
Lack of Patience
Suppose if we have enough time to explain then we may not have that much patience to wait till they understand. We may be short temper by nature and may not be able to tolerate them even for few minutes. If they cry for something and we do not want to satisfy their demand then we explain them in few sentences and take the rod as we can not tolerate their loud noise of crying any more. If we can not explain them anything at that particular moment then just ignore them. Their volume of crying will automatically lower down if they will not get attention.
Use the Rod and Teach Violence
We must check that whether we really want to control the kids by using the rod or it is simply the manifestation of our anger. We can not achieve permanent change in the kids by using the rod as it can change the hardware only and not the software. We will have to change their mind for the permanent result which can only be done by the rod of good thoughts and that also not at the time when they are in violent mood with zero acceptance level but at the play time when they can accept and understand the good thoughts given in the light form like small stories, games etc.. If we use the rod, they will use the same rod to get the things done from their sisters, brothers and friends. Actually, whatever we will give them we will get them back multiplied thousand times.
Self Ego We must check that while beating we may have hidden ego like "If I can not control these little ones then how will I be able to control the rest? They must obey my orders and do as I say". We may be taking it as a challenge and try to get the result by hook or by crook and at last we hold the rod. Instead of it we can remain firm in our statements. If we do not want to fulfil their particular demand then simply tell them and after that anybody else or they themselves will not be able to fulfil it without our permission. Bear the side effects like crying, shouting etc. but no need to use the rod. Jignesh N. Diwanji